The How Do I Get Laid When Everyone Thinks I'm Gay And Autistic Tee is Unethical Threads at peak absurdity. This shirt lives in the overlap between self-aware and slightly unhinged. If your friends already roast you about your love life, this just makes it official.
The design is on the back of the shirt, because the people behind you deserve to know what they're looking at. The I Belong To Mommy backprint lands different at a bar than it does at a family dinner, but honestly it works at both.
The Invention of the Word Boob Funny Wordplay Tee from Unethical Threads gives the English language's most architecturally perfect word the scientific diagram it deserves. Each letter labeled by viewing angle on a heavyweight cotton graphic tee.
The Never Fake An Orgasm Bold Text Tee from Unethical Threads puts the quiet part in bold red and black type, then scratches half of it out for emphasis. It's unisex with a relaxed fit that works for everyone.
If your love language is making people visibly uncomfortable in public, this is your uniform. Heavyweight cotton that actually feels like a shirt, not a transparent cry for help. Heavyweight cotton with a relaxed fit.
The Never Fake An Orgasm Tee from Unethical Threads is a dark-humor graphic tee with one rule: stop being polite about bad performance. Heavyweight cotton, a no-symbol graphic, and the kind of honesty most people are too scared to wear.
The Ankle Monitors Are Sexy Tee from Unethical Threads says what the justice system won't. Heavyweight cotton graphic tee for people whose humor has a record of its own. If your type has a curfew, wear it proud.
Heavyweight cotton, unisex relaxed fit, and a polite suggestion that the whales are handling it. Is this shirt actually about whales?. Everyone else will be fine. Much like the whales. It's also for the crowd that understands caring about things and being insufferable about things are two very different skills.
The Rock Your Cock Out Tee from Unethical Threads is a back print graphic tee that lets everyone behind you know exactly where you stand. It's crude, it's funny, and if you need it explained, this probably isn't your shirt.
This is a surgical-strike gift. You give it to the friend who already makes this joke about themselves, not the friend who would need it explained. The How Do I Get Laid When Everyone Thinks I'm Gay And Autistic tee is Unethical Threads doing what we do best: saying the thing you were already thinking.