Heavyweight cotton, because at least your wardrobe choices can be sustainable. If you've ever described humanity's run as "good while it lasted," this is your uniform. You care about the planet. You just also have eyes.
The Ankle Monitors Are Sexy Tee from Unethical Threads says what the justice system won't: those little blinking bracelets have a certain charm. This tee is for anyone who looked at an ankle monitor and thought "accessorize.".
The Cinco De Mayo More Like Cinco Go Die Yo White Tee is Unethical Threads' contribution to your May 5th wardrobe. It says what you're thinking while everyone else is pretending to care about margarita specials.
That's sort of the point. Unethical Threads makes apparel for people who find humor in places others won't look. You already know if you're the target audience. It's a dark humor twist on carpe diem.
Heavyweight cotton, DTG printed, sizes S through 4XL. People who survived a Cinco de Mayo that required an apology text to their own body. This is honest reporting, not fashion. Is This a Good Cinco de Mayo Gift?.
Heavyweight cotton, real DTG print, and the kind of joke that makes your parole officer sigh. This is the gift you give when a gift card feels lazy and you want to prove you actually know the person.
Heavyweight cotton, DTG-printed, and way funnier than whatever excuse you were going to use. It's heavyweight cotton with a broken-in feel. Not stiff, not flimsy. The kind of shirt you grab first out of the drawer.
The I'm Not A Cactus Expert But I Know A Prick When I See One Tee is Unethical Threads at peak passive-aggressive. Heavyweight cotton that feels substantial, not like a tissue paper situation. The design is printed on the back.
The design lives on the back of the shirt, so people read it as you walk away. Perfect timing. This isn't subtle, and that's the whole point. 100% cotton. Unisex fit S-2XL. DTG print. DTG printing locks the color in.
You were never going to change the world anyway. Might as well get comfortable and own it. Pre-shrunk, so no surprise crop top after the first wash. The Be The Change I'm Changing The Channel Tee says what a gift card never could.